Sunday, March 25, 2018

March went so fast

Things have been rather hectic and intense of late. We put our house on the market March 9th- so there was work for that and of course the thinning is ongoing. I had been having some symptoms I didn't like and went to see my cardiologist.  She had me do a stress echo test- she called the next day to say she didn't like part of what she saw. So the 12th I had an angiogram and a major blockage was found- so I now have a stent to take care of that- at least the rest in there looked good.  So I am on a blood thinner for at least a year-to avoid clots around the stent. The part that surprised mt was I now have nitro pills-  I know I have coronary disease- and that along with the stent  makes to possibility of an "event" go up. So I am getting use to a new normal.  So thankful this was discovered and dealt with. The work of late has been in my journal. I have packed much of the studio but have left a few things out and the rest that is packed I can get to if I just have to cause I didn't seal the boxes yet.  I will include the narrative I wrote for each spread- these where shared with two different art groups I am a part of. I will start with a February spread.

February 18
Well today was challenging - we got around 9 inches of snow- a reminder that winter up here in northern Minnesota is far from over- Made the best of it and got more studio sorting and packing done and I had to do a spread. I have this book that is 5 1/2 x 81/4 so the spreads are 5 1/2 x 16 1/2. It is a book about rocks- I am using it as a journal. I will often do backgrounds using paint I have left from other projects. This one is called:
Adrift in the Sea of Uncertainty. The song by Jesse Marchant - "Adrift" was in my head. 

Drifting in a Sea of Uncertainty 

February 14
Hello all- I have been working hard on the thinning and sorting and have piles for two art teaches in town that were art education students of mine. I just had to work on something today it has been so long. As I was sorting I came across all these zines I had saved. The Studio zine is one Teesha Moore did in the late 90s early2000s. I have several pieces in different issues- I was unprepared for the emotional reaction I had. That was such a great fun time. So the spread today: "It is hard to cut" is about that and just the emotional part of going through things that trigger all these memories.

It is Hard to Cut

March 14 at 2:30pm
Took the morning to work on a spread- I want to thank you for your loving and supportive comments concerning my heart issues. I really does mean so much and I know it makes a difference. So glad I only had to spend one night in the hospital. This was another one of those wake-up reminders that this is no dress rehearsal - and to live my life- thankful for each day. To me it is a marvel that they can go in from an artery to your heart- see what the arteries look like and then repair a blockage. SO this experience was one of those reminders that yes in fact we are mortal and to make the best of the time we have. Thank you again from my repaired heart!

Repaired Heart

 It has been a while- I had to go to my journal today. Lots to process. I have been off kilter since my getting the stent put in and being told I have to have nitro pills with me at all times- guess stent people are more likely to have a heart attack. I deal with depression and sometimes something like this heart stuff knocks me off kilter- I don't recovery as fast as I use to - often I circle the abyss as do many with depression but I can usually stay away from the edge- this has been a challenge. This spread sort of illustrates my state right now- I am finally up out of the pity party chair. The figures in the upper right are from the artistic director of The Heart of the Beast Puppet and Mask Theater, Sandy Spieler. They are to me - Ron and I holding our dream of a new home together. When I get in a downward spiral I tend to play melancholy music- it feels like a warm quilt of comfort around me. But I am surfacing again.I started cardio rehab this week and that helps- House has been on the market for 16 days and have had only one couple come look. I know eventually it will sell.

Off The Pity Party Chair